OUTSPOKEN!

That isn't something I really thought was a problem.
But...
Apparently that is just how I come off to people.

"STRONG, INTIMIDATING, OUTSPOKEN, STRAIGHT-FORWARD, BLUNT, TRUTHFUL..."-words often used by others to describe me

I know that I have always had strong beliefs about EVERYTHING.
I mean give me a topic and I will research it JUST to have an opinion.
BUT...
This temperament of mine hasn't always made me best friends with others.
And in all honesty I was often confused and hurt by these bumps in the friendship road.
WHY DON'T THEY LIKE ME?
In particular, with ladies and gentlemen.
I tend to not get along with sexist, narrowminded, jerk-type men.

They have never liked me.

It is almost as if they can smell the lack of naivety I am willing to display for the sake of their attention.

This part of my personality is a blessing to me though.
Repelling jerks and mean men is quite the attribute.
PRAISE GOD.

....

...

..

.

 Women on the other hand.

This is tricky.
Because I LOVE women.

One second...

I meant to say, I  LOVE WOMEN!!!

We are amazing.

I love that we can trust one another because we GET IT.

We understand the cramps, cravings, mild mood swings, struggles and all the other beautiful things that are SUPPOSED to unite us and not divide us. 

I love women of intelligence.

Who have a voice and are willing to admit when they don't necessarily have an opinion on a topic.

Women who are willing to turn from the cute guy in their life and listen to you pour out your heart on whatever topic is burdening you.

Women who believe in making SISTERS and not just friends.

I know what I am describing is quite rare...
Well, at least in ORANGE COUNTY.
BUT THIS IS THE HOPE I HAVE IN US AS WOMEN.
This is what I strive for.

And I know that you can't attract people like this unless it something that you uphold yourself.

I see all the warfare and attacks made upon us.

And I see how the enemy truly seeks to divide us because we are quite powerful.

Don't forget that ADAM only took that bite because HIS beautiful Eve was asking Him too.

I can only imagine how persuasive and the power she held over her man.

Anyway, I digress...

"I am not for everyone."
Someone once told me this.
To my face.
I respect this women and YES we are still good friends.

It hurt at the moment.
But I get it now.
I'm not made for the shallow relationships we have grown to accept as "FRIENDSHIPS".

And without even trying to say that I stand for I speak volumes in being true to who I am...
 

I wish I could BE for everyone.
The people pleaser in me wants YOU ALL TO LOVE ME.
But you don't. And I get it!!
I really do.


I don't have it all together.
I suck at communicating.
I enjoy being alone more than calling every second.
I don't like talking about my personal life and what I did with so-n-so when we hung out.
I think it is rude to constantly ask "WHO I AM TALKING TO" when I answer a text or call while you were in the bathroom or not nearby.
I think it is rude to not apologize while you text mid sentence during our conversation.
ONLY THAT YOU DON'T APOLOGIZE. Not the texting.
I make jokes to avoid silence.
I blab and ramble the thoughts on my head and then apologize for taking away from your time because I want you to be happy with me and the conversation we are having.
WEIRD?
YES!
That is me.
AND I TRULY AM PRAYING TO REFLECT CHRIST MORE AND MORE.
I am quite frankly one of the most socially awkward people I know.
AND up until this week I thought it was "cool".
Because sometimes I always picture life as a movie and what scenes would be funny or engaging...etc... etc..
And awkward people are funny in film...
...

Yes. This is who I am.

I love letting people know that I am laughing.
Or struggling.
So I constantly am erasing all of my LOL's and HA HA HA's.
And debating on deleting a blog post about how horrible I am doing.


YES~ THIS IS THE GIRL YOU ARE FOLLOWING.
I really understand if you just click UNFOLLOW after all this.
It would make sense. haha

This post isn't really following to well but I am not done yet.

I am at a point in life where I am sick of stereotypical women.
For example. This is a an example of women I can never quite understand...

A woman I know is constantly complaining.
Let us call her Jane and say the complaint is about the men in her life.
She doesn't understand why they are always blowing her off and nothing ever works out.
She goes out with them, they hook up and everything seems perfect.
But now they aren't responding to texts or phonecalls?
They are always "BUSY"...
...
..
.

This Jane goes out of her way to tell me all of this.
I never asked but because I am always willing to listen I hear this.
I nod and listen and then I am prompted with the typical "WHAT DO I DO...?"

Well, to all the Janes here is an FYI.
YOU ASK PEOPLE THIS QUESTION ONLY WHEN YOU REALLY WANT TO HEAR AN OPINION ON THE MATTER. lol Seriously... I get in trouble here sometimes.

So I respond "Well, have you ever thought that maybe there is a pattern going on?"
Jane: "what do you mean by pattern?"
me: Meaning that maybe there is something you could be doing that attracts these certain guys?

Here is where I mess up. People don't want to think they are in the wrong at all. Especially in relationships and dating.

Jane: No, I mean I'm just myself and I'm the same way. I just want a guy who is real and isn't going to just bail.
Me; When do they tend to bail or start playing games?
Jane: I don't know Che. It just happens....

AND I LEAVE IT AT THAT!
I know that people who aren't Christian obviously don't understand that sleeping with every guy that thinks your cute isn't the road to success and marriage...
I get it.
I don't preach I just like to get people to question their roles.

Is that so harmful?
Is that too blunt?
I don't know what I am trying to say.
Truly I don't know what this post is about even.
 I may just delete it.


But I believe the gist of these uncontrolled thoughts is that I have a strong personality. And contrary to what I want to believe not everyone can handle it.

AND. I accept that.
I accept that "I AM NOT FOR EVERYONE".
 You know why.
Because in the midst of perhaps turning a few people off.
I have a handful of real sisters and friends who can appreciate that in all of my flaws I hold back in nothing.
I am unique and different.
And I can say that the people who love me and seek to spend time with me and the girls that walk the lake with me, go see a film with me, meet me for coffee JUST because they want to have a conversation with me.

These women truly love ME.
Because that is all that I am.
I could put on a facade and change faces in order to please you all.
But instead I keep the ugly and real Che on 24/7 and take the risk of winning and losing some.




I hope that made sense.
I was just overwhelmed with the urge to speak out about who I am.

And I really want to encourage you ladies out there.
People don't NEED to love you and want to be around you.
It is okay that there are one or two people at school or church who seem to sigh with annoyance when your around.
And who knows. 
Perhaps it is in your head?
All I know is that GOD made you the way that HE SAW FIT.
Your not perfected until HIS GLORY IS REVEALED IN ALL OF ITS RICHNESS and we are with HIM FOREVER IN ETERNITY.

So pray, read your BIBLE, ask GOD TO TRANSFORM YOU INTO HIS IMAGE (not a better version of yourself for this world) and be blessed knowing that everyday no matter how much you mess up or say the wrong thing, or in my case SAY TOO MUCH, that GOD LOVES YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE and there is not a thing HE WOULD CHANGE.

Your beautiful and unique in your creation.
And God only desires a REAL, INTIMATE, PERSONAL relationship with YOU! The crazy, loud and annoying girl you just might be.




Thanks for reading.
I'm going to resist the urge to delete and say sorry.




♥cheche

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Creativity!!! ♥

It is soooooo hard to be creative.
I know that this is something that I happen to have. To my knowledge at least, all of us weird people are creative.
Right?
I'm sure there are a few odd-balls out there who lack the ability to EXPRESS their creativity clearly.
But Creative they are nonetheless!

Basically y'all, this here lil blog of mine (I've always wanted a southern drawl. please don't judge)
is getting an EXTREME CHE MAKEOVER.
BUT... My only problem is I am too broke to ask someone to do it for me.
ANDDD I am such a control freak that I doubt someone would be able to afford me.
Seriously. We would have to shoot back and forth emails for a year until I probably approved.
NOW IF IT WERE FREE that would be easy.

Anyways, I've been slaving away (okay maybe not THAT much) on this blog.
Trying to get the look and feel that I have been lacking finally together.
But it is soooo extremely difficult.
FONTS!
TEXTURE (or pictures)
LAYOUT....
This is too much.
I just want a beautiful pink filled blog (sorry for those who hate pink but it ain't going nowhere lol) that shows the joy I  have for my savior and the life I'm living with Him.

BUT that obviously is asking a lot.
Or I am a perfectionist and too prideful to just have someone do it for me.

How are you all doing?

OH AND BTW... DO YOU LIKE THE NEW NAME??????
I felt it reflected my personality a lot more. And also since I am so random in what I write to you all about I felt it was an accurate title for my various rambles, blabs, rants and epiphanies.

Well, I pray you all like it because I kinda do. A lot... Plus it has my name in it :). The annotated version of CHETREANNA. :)


Look out for my new header coming soon!!!

OH, and I am seriously so blessed by just the last few blogs I wrote. Letting you guys in on a really difficult time I believe really helped me cry out and fall on my face before God and truly receive His forgiveness and love. I don't know how He did it, I wish I could see the formula and method so you could all KNOW exactly what I did but it was just Him. He just showered me while praying last night with just grace and love. I am so blessed to have a GOD who blesses us for NO REASON at all. Only for the simple fact that He loves us!! And I can boast in Him and say that NOTHING I have done or will ever do can make me anymore loved or less loved by my Father in Heaven.

THANK YOU JESUS!!!

♥CheChe

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Hello. It is Thursday :) <♥>

 waiting in my car for the ladies to show up before we head out. Photo sessions in the car... oh memories...

HELLO,..
SO I HAD A VERY EVENTFUL DAY YESTERDAY.
I FOUND MY PHONE THAT I HAD LOST THE DAY BEFORE! YAY!! THEN TODAY I WOKE UP AND REALIZED I HAD LOST MY CHARGER...THANKFULLY I KNOW WHERE IT IS :).

not my phone :).

I MET UP WITH SOME OF MY GIRLS YESTERDAY AND WE DROVE TO A FRIENDS HOUSE WHO IS GOING TO COURT TODAY AND MAY FACE JUVENILETIME. SHE WAS SO SWEET AND BEAUTIFUL. WE GOT TO PRAY FOR HER ANDJUST HANG OUT WITH HER AT HER HOUSE. SHE IS STRUGGLING WITH GIVING IT ALL TO THE LORD. SHE HAS BAD FRIENDS IN HER LIFE AND SHE ISN'T YET READY TO OBEY WHAT GOD IS ASKING OF HER. WHICH IS JUST TO TRUST HIM.

BUT THE AMAZING THING IS GOD DOESN'T CARE WHERE SHE IS TODAY. HE  HEARD OUR PRAYERS. HE CRIED THROUGH HER. HE KNOWS THE HEAVINESS HER HEART IS FEELING. AND HE BROUGHT ALL 10 OF US STRANGERS TO HER HOME YESTERDAY JUST TO SHOW HER SHE HAS ANOTHER CHOICE. SHE HAS WOMEN  WHO WANT TO SEE HER AT HER BEST AND WALKING WITH THE LORD. WHO DON'T

JUDGE BECAUSE WE KNOW WHO WE ARE WITHOUT GOD. AND IT AIN'T MUCH :).

I WILL NEVER BE SKINNY! IT JUST AIN'T IN THE CARDS FOR ME. TODAY IT HIT ME AS I WAS LOOKING AT VARIOUS PICTURES OF BEAUTIFUL WOMEN. THIS ISN'T REALITY FOR ME. I AM DESIGNED WITH LARGER HIENEY. WITH A FULLER BUST. A BIT OF A GUT. AND IN SOME ANGLES A DOUBLE CHIN. LOL. AND YOU KNOW WHAT. THAT DOESN'T CHANGE GODS LOVE FOR ME. IT DOESN'T CHANGE THE WAY MY FUTURE HUSBAND WILL LOOK AT ME. IT DOESN'T CHANGE MY SMILE. OR MY HEART. IT DOESN'T MAKE ME ANY LESS SMART. OR ANY LESS CAPABLE. IT DOESN'T DEFINE ME. I AM STILL BEAUTIFUL..

ON MONDAY I ALMOST HIT KOBE BRYANT. I WASN'T LOOKING WHERE I WAS DRIVING AS ME AND A FRIEND LEFT WHOLE FOODS AND I LOOK UP AND I'M A FOOT AWAY FROM A  BLACKED OUT MERCEDES. MY HEART DROPPED. NOT BECAUSE OF KOBE BUT BECAUSE I  ALMOST HIT HIS MILLION DOLLAR CAR ;(. THAT WOULD'VE SUCKED BEYOND BELIEF.  I DON'T REALLY CARE FOR KOBE. I MEAN I DON'T DISLIKE HIM. BUT WHEN IT COMES TO STARS I GET MORE EXCITED WHEN I SEE A PHILANTHROPIST THAN A BASKETBALL PLAYER OR REALITY STAR OR MOVIE STAR OR YOUTUBE STAR... THERE ARE SO MANY THESE DAYS. I GET EXCITED WHEN I SEE PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY USE THEIR PLATFORM TO CHANGE THIS

WORLD. BUT THAT IS A RARE COMMODITY IN THE REALM OF STARDOM.

I WANT TO GO AWAY AND READ. I HAVE BEEN WANTING TOO. BUT I JUST CAN'T  WILL MYSELF TO DO IT. IT'S QUITE ANNOYING. JUST THOUGHT I'D SHARE SINCE I'M  BEING RANDOM AND ALL OVER THE PLACE IN THIS ONE.

THANK YOU LORD FOR ANOTHER DAY. ANOTHER MOMENT. AND ANOTHER REASON TO LOVE YOU.

doesn't this look amazing!! I wonder what the drink is??

the pizza we at last night was soooo delicious. given that i was starved.

THE END.


♥ CHETREANNA ♥

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Caught my Eye ♥

i love this. Praise God that HE loves the little children!

Ladies. I am feeling kind of sick and I have an amazing womens conference coming up this FRIDAY-SUNDAY at the Calvary Chapel Murrietta Bible College and I really, really want to be able to take a sulfur bath in the hot springs when I go :). So pray. Pray I get to enjoy this time away from the world surrounded by women all seeking our Saviours wisdom, knowledge and love in regards to the ministry He has for them on this earth. It is called WHEN WOMEN LEAD and I know that every woman attending will be blessed because we are not called to be the spiritual leaders of our households but we are called as CHRISTIANS to lead nonetheless in the areas of ministry and work He has placed us in. Including our Blogs. Glory should be given to him in ALL AREAS.

I know. I'm not perfect and I have time after time ranted over my falls but get back up and LEAD! Don't let that fall or that u-turn keep you from getting back on His path for your life. The only one stopping you is YOU because GOD is all powerful to do what we cannot for ourselves.


Here are some lovely images that caught my eye today. I love them for so many reasons. Please enjoy ladies ♥

so... pretty self-explanitory I think :)?

 

 

not too crazy about the shoes and socks together but everything else is so beautiful! She makes pregnancy look so sweet and amazing. Not that it isn't but this is just my ideal outfit. lol Comfy and Pretty!!!

 

 

 

 

thank you Lord for this one. We are collectively as women those different "types" of beautiful. Amazing isn't it.

I adore this calligraphy. And this phrase is definitely a love note I write and speak to God often. Not so much in the physical aspect but spiritually. Sometimes I just want to run off spiritually with HiM above and beyond this world we live in and get away from society. I don't know if that makes sense or not but it is the best explanation I can come up with.

 

 

 

So I am off to go enjoy the day. I did a CYCLING class yesterday and surprisingly today I am not sore. I surely thought I would be. I do, however, feel much flatter in the tummy. That is a great feeling. I often wake up bloated. haha. I love you all and thanks for stopping by. Be blessed today ♥

CheTreAnna :)

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Che and her RAMBLES #2

A dear sister and fellow blogger is having an amazing GIVEAWAY! Please go check it out :).

Isn't it a bit weird when couples look alike?

And why does it seem to be that most couples resemble each other?

Would it creep you out if you realized one day that your husband looks just like you?

I only say this because it weirds me out a lot when I see couples, especially MARRIED couples, who look just like each other. I mean perhaps it is that inward appreciation or obsession of self that comes into play here. But I find it fascinating and awkward. The therapist in me wants to sit these couples down and ask them WHY? Why are you married or in love with your twin? Can't you see how difficult it is for others to look at you guys together without questioning if your dating or brother and sister??

I am terribly sorry. I usually keep my rants and disturbances to myself because I talk a lot in everyday life and I tend to cover how I am feeling throughout those various conversations. BUT, being that I was sent home from work sick and I have some free time before I need to go meet a sister for coffee I thought I would let out what I would be discussing with coworkers with y'all.

Today I found another new blog that I love.

I speak fluent sarcasm but over the last two years I sort of stopped practicing the language due to the fact that in psychology sarcasm is classified as a defense mechanism. Well, this initially hurt and bruised my pride but then something strange happened after that class. Whenever I would go to speak SARCASTICALLY, I would realize why I felt the need to insert sarcasm and it was usually out of way to make things more tolerable and to protect myself from those "unpleasant" emotions. Which, growing up, for me was sadness or pain. Anyways I still can appreciate a sarcastic and sassy use of the English language but I often wonder what the sarcasm is replacing and/or hiding.

So basically this blog is random :). Thankfully that doesn't matter. I love you all and I pray that none of your are sent home sick from work and that God richly blesses you on this day. If you allow Him of course. THE CHOICE IS YOURS ♥.

00000Chetreanna00000

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